Finding humor in the craziness, happiness in the slow down and faith in the SUCK of coronavirus and the year 2020!

When the coronavirus started I felt like it was somewhat of a relief. 

I loved having my family home and I appreciated the fact that life slowed down.  I felt blessed by the fact that my children were all in a phase of life that this virus was not going to leave too large of an impression on them. We would all have some extra family bonding time, the virus would pass, and life would move on as normal.  When life did not continue as normal, in fact daily the news is posting conflicting ideas about what corona is and what it is not, I have to admit I have let coronavirus get the best of my emotions as of late. This week I have somewhat given up on forcing positivity in my life! Monday, I watched an entire season of Heartland, I believe that is the most sitting I have ever done in my life. 

Yesterday, I sat out in the pool and floated around while listening to my book for a couple of hours. This pool has truly been my saving grace this summer, I seriously LOVE having a pool! I am already having anxiety about moving and leaving the pool behind. It will be a traumatic day! One of the greatest things about having a pool is how enjoyable it is to close the rings on my apple watch, one of the only goals I have stuck to through all of this. Overall I have been disconnected and fighting my negativity this week. I realize it is petty to be annoyed at the fact that stores are closing by 8:30 PM and earlier...Still, I am. I want to plan a trip and I want to go inside the restaurant to eat. Yet, at the same time, I feel fear at the idea of doing so. I am tired of wearing these dumb masks everywhere that say right on them, "DOES not PROTECT against CORONAVIRUS." Yet, it makes you an unthoughtful citizen in the community to not wear it.  I am over this virus and I am ready for it to go away!! 

Last night at 10 PM, I could see that me being in a funk all week was taking a toll on our children's mental states. It is interesting how our children and their ability to handle the chaos going on around them has so much to do with how mom and dad are handling it!  I could see that the kids needed to get out of the house, we made a fire and things started off pleasantly, and then all HELL broke loose. Emotions were flying all over the place and lets just say s'more time did not last too long.  Immediately, I knew that although we are responsible for our own behaviors and actions, I had a lot to do with the way the kids were feeling in that moment. As I spent the week expressing fear, panic and the desire to jump ship their safety nets disappeared.  I am sure our neighbors were curious what kind of crazy was happening at our house late last night.  As I contemplated how to get control of emotions gone wild, I knew in that moment, discipline was not the answer. I called a family pow wow at 11 PM. In this meeting I told about the time my mom and dad made all of us children wire bikes with enough seats for each member of the family. They told us how during this life journey, at times some of the members of the family were going to be too tired to pedal and the other members would need to pick up the slack. At other times, some members may put on the brakes while you are going up a hill, or traveling through a mud puddle. During these times, everyone else will need to pedal extra hard to keep the family going but that is what a family does. That is what love is. We all have determined to try a little harder to do our part when it comes to pedalling. I apologized for being unwilling to pedal this week, and they assured me I was the best mom in the world and none of this was my fault. Kids are the greatest! I am thankful for my family and for a solid testimony that helps me get things back on track when I start to slide off a bit. The news is making it easy to find reasons to complain about others actions and behaviors. The news makes it easy to feel fear over what is happening in our world right now. Our new family mantra is, "find humor in the craziness, happiness in the slow down, and faith in the suck of coronavirus and the year 2020! "